Colour of water - Part 1 : Nature
Posted: 23 September 2003 Word Count: 232 Summary: Water is a precious thing. For survival of life water is gold.
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Colour of Water - Part 1:Nature
What colour are you, Water? Mix me in anything and I become that colour! I change with seasons I change with the weather I change in the light
Add orange squash and I am coloured orange Fill me in a red coloured glass and I am red Stir coffee or tea in me and I am brown or black I look green with vegetation under me I look blue with nothing under me, except the canopy of the blue sky Otherwise I am pure and clear
I look dirty, ugly, dull and smelly When MAN dumps all his dirt, waste and burden on me I am polluted I take my revenge with disease and death No one can touch me then
See me in my natural environment Respect me Care for me Love and nurture me I will return three fold My freshness My coolness My beauty Keep me pure, clean, clear and fresh I will break your thirst and keep you in health
Lets be partners in the creation of natural harmony You will see my beauty… In the flow of a waterfall, a stream, a river, sea or an ocean I will give you sense of peace I will cool you or warm you I will transport you BUT… Give me space I am the colour you make me!
c. Meena Vyas June 2003
Comments by other Members
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Fearless at 09:08 on 23 September 2003
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This was nice. Water reflects whatever is in our soul, nature... If we are bad (polluting, etc), water reflects that. If we are pure and gentle, it reflects that too.
Fearless
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Felmagre at 09:58 on 23 September 2003
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What an amazing thought. I'd never thought of water becoming whatever we wish it to become, like some sort of shape shifter in a science fiction story.
Your poem is very interesting, thought provoking. I wonder though if you might not tighten it up a little by 'tweeking' it, making it a dialogu almost between the water and the questioner, as well as removing some and, the,etc. Just an idea.
I trust you do not mind but I've taken the liberty to showing below what I was suggesting.
What colour are you, Water?
Mix me in anything;
I'll become that colour!
I'm change with seasons
I'm change with weather
I'm change in light
Add orange squash I'm coloured orange
In a red coloured glass, I'm red
Add coffee or tea then I'm brown or black
I look green, mingles with vegetation
though blue with nothing under me, except a canopy of sky.
Undiluted I'm pure and clear.
I look dirty; ugly; dull and smelly,
when MAN dumps his waste,
his burden on me;
for then I'm polluted
Though I'll take my revenge,
Disease and death I'll spread
no one will touch me then
See me in natural surrounds;
Respect me, care for me
Love and nurture me.
I'll give in return,three fold
My freshness
My coolness
My beauty
Keep me pure, clean, clear and fresh
I'll break your thirst;
I'll keep you in health.
Partners in creation of natural harmony
Your'll see my beauty…
In the flow of waterfalls,
streams; rivers, seas and oceans.
But.....
Give me space,
Then I'll transport you,
I'll give peace
I'll cool or warm you
I am the colour you make me!
Please do not be offended, by my 'meddling' only I would like to help, support and suggest, in the manner I have been helped by others. 'passing on the blessing' sort of
Kind regards
Felicity.
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Meena at 10:38 on 23 September 2003
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Fel magre
Thanks for that. Your versions good. But if I change it becomes your poetry and not mine. Although I am grateful for your suggestion and please keep suggesting on my other poems as I put them up. I am not at all offended. But a qusetion. Do you mind I use some bits from your version, just in case!
Best wishes
Meena
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Meena at 10:44 on 23 September 2003
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Fearless
We meet again with words to share. Yes, I love water and I find water very beautiful, especailly clean lakes, rivers, canals etc.. When I was pregnant I never had any food or other desires as such but I always wished to go and set near lakes, rivers, sea etc..I always found them soothing, although I do know that water can be cruel also. I am writing a poem on that too. This was part 1 - the beauty. Part 2 is its cruelty.
Best
Meena
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Felmagre at 11:44 on 23 September 2003
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of course not. The poem though is yours, only the suggestions are mine as the thoughts and idea was/is yours.
That said you may do as you please with what has been suggested. And I shall be pleased to comment on poems submitted, likewise I too am always pleased to receive feedback in whatever vein, so long as it is constructive, on anything I post, it should make us better writers in the end.
Kind regards and thank you for the thoughts you have shared, I shall look at water in a somewhat different light from today.
Felicity.
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Tina at 12:32 on 24 September 2003
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This - like the water is very clear and beautiful.
How much of nature is always adapting to the human environment - how sad that we lack the ability to adapt / mingle into nature.
Thanks
Tina
x
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peterxbrown at 00:38 on 25 September 2003
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I think this is a great poem. It has all the skill of an accomplished writer and also speaks out forcefully about our often strained relationship with nature.
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Meena at 09:07 on 25 September 2003
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peterxbrown
Thank you so much for your comment. I love nature and and I love being near water. I have done part 2 to this and am working on part 3. The basic point is to see water in all its mood, the natural, the beautiful and at its cruel nature, just like humans.
Meena
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Meena at 09:08 on 25 September 2003
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Tina
I am glad you liked this. See part 2 as well. I hope it is just as wonderful.
Meena
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