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A Commitment

by LiverbirdLou 

Posted: 21 September 2003
Word Count: 170


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Last evening I was out on the streets in the chill.
I followed my darling, home.
Walking away from me because I overwhelmed her soul.
Perhaps Im too good too be true.

How can I stop wanting her?
What am I supposed to do?
Many months ago I cradled her in my arms.
The air was cool and the night was dark.

In her ear I whispered how much I loved her.
She begged me to promise her forever.
I promised her and she smiled at me.
The one I adore, so amazing, my leader, my key.

We glanced up to the cloudless sky
I prayed for something to demonstrate our attraction.
Suddenly a snowflake fell out of the blue.
We smiled and kissed before embracing tight.

Now my heart feels forever torn.
I gazed into her eyes, another person she was.
Dont love me! She cried now taunts and disturbs my mind,
Because on that one night long ago, I promised her that I would never stop.






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Comments by other Members



AimeeLou1984 at 12:17 on 09 March 2006  Report this post
I really liked the twist at the end where she no longer wanted him/her. I thought this was a powerful poem and I liked the fact that it didn't stick to the stereotype of poems and rhyme.

Thanks for sharing!
Aimee xxx


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