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Father

by John G.Hall 

Posted: 17 November 2006
Word Count: 157
Summary: is to live everything, if so we already have it.
Related Works: My Mothers Knitting • 

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Father




Part I

A fathers dying wish for his son (later he lived)


His smile turns to mercury
then slides down his face,

His own body turns him in
for thirty pieces of platelet.

My child's hand strokes
my fatherís rag doll fist.

With eyes closed his genie
asks to me to set him free.

I rub his veins even harder
hoping I can release him,

from the cooling down of death
or maybe just life's burning up.

Either way he slowly opens
his garotted mouth to speak

but he is a resident of Babel now
dropping every piece of alphabet

I nod as if I understand his wishes
and he smiles hoping I never do.



Part II



My Father's Walking


Now he wears a slow silver shocked look
Carries a wooden sceptre in his soft grip,

Burns his bridges behind his fiery cataracts
And steps like an iron man in a world of rust.



John G.Hall(C)2006






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Comments by other Members



Account Closed at 10:18 on 01 December 2006  Report this post
I think this is actually 2 poems, and not a Part 1/Part 2 mix. I think they both stand alone rather than together. (Much like my feelings about banoffi pie - why put 2 wonderful ingredients like toffee and bananas together to ruin them when they're far better alone!!??)

:))

Both are very strong, poignant and bleak pieces, and carry a hefty punch. I'd take out the "(later he lived)" part in the title of the first poem - as it takes away from the power.

Good stuff

A
xxx

Beanie Baby at 20:08 on 05 December 2006  Report this post
Very touching piece, this, John. It says so much about the child-parent relationship (and perhaps more so the father-son relationship)and I think it is really artistically written.

Anne is right when she says that they could stand out as two separate entities, but personally, I feel one belongs with the other!
Beanie


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