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How Autumn Comes

by John G.Hall 

Posted: 06 November 2006
Word Count: 29
Summary: weather to change, a memory from my trip to the Isle of Arran
Related Works: Arran Natured • 
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How Autumn Comes

The blue mirrors sun
glittered each bay green wave,

the summer rain wept on me
the blue mirrors moon,

so this is how autumn comes.

JGH(C)2006






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Beanie Baby at 12:37 on 06 November 2006  Report this post
Hello John.
This is quite mystical and also soothing. I like
'blue mirrors sun' 'blue mirrors moon' - and in fact wondered if you could drop the 'the' that precedes the lines as in:

blue mirrors sun
glittered each bay green wave,

the summer rain wept on me
blue mirrors moon,

so this is how autumn comes.

Since 'the' also appears in line three and the actual poem itself is only 23 words in length, I just feel as if it's been overused a little.

Just a thought.
Beanie.
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