Chain of events
Posted: 09 September 2003 Word Count: 544 Summary: Just a short story - hope it reads ok.
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I love that feeling I get as I slowly awake from a long nights sleep. The sun reaching out to me with its gentle rays of first light as it dawns upon the world. Almost as if it’s calling me I turn my head and body to face it. I’m still half asleep and I slowly begin to fully appreciate its warmth after a little while. I’m still dewy eyed from the long nights sleep, but the sun soon warms me up and I stretch myself up, fully awakening. This is my second favourite part of the day, it’s so invigorating and refreshing, but the best is yet to come. It’s still only dawn but I can hear the chorus of birds calling to all that they are alive and free, and that it’s time for lazy folk to get up and join the world for another glorious day. The sky is awash with colours cascading gently into each other with the sky as its canvas, there has never been a better painting. This is my favourite part of the day now as the sun fully rises in the sky, all around me workers rush to and fro, while I laze and take in the scenery. I enjoy watching them work, it must be fascinating to be one of them, to see so many sights, go so many places. I envy them but at the same time feel they must envy me in my pasture of paradise. It may not seem much just to be a watcher of the world, but being a watcher means I see things others are too busy to see, too busy to acknowledge, too busy to even realise exists. I too see many folk, I see them everyday, some even stop for a while and then pass on, continuing their hectic lives. The only regret I do have is living near a school. I do not enjoy children’s presence. Do not misunderstand me. I have many of my own, they are all beautiful and I get a great deal of enjoyment watching them grow alongside me, but the children in this school are different from my own offspring. These children do not understand my way of life. They are too boisterous and even destructive at times. They know not the harm they do, but it does not lessen my resentment for them. I have lost many a good friend to them, and one day I fear they will take my life from me too. I have seen them pull the heads straight off of some, and with such ease too, it is truly horrifying, and then they garnish themselves with the carcasses, yet they discard the bodies when they tire of them. They are never pleased. I enjoy my life here, and hope it can continue until my wilting body rejoins the earth. I may not be much to be look at, but to be pulled from mother earth, from my birthplace is not a forgivable act in my books. Especially as it is only to make me and the bodies of others into a child’s play thing. I hope I never become part of what they call a daisy chain; I am too proud a flower for that.
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Anna Reynolds at 13:19 on 16 September 2003
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Vicky, this is lovely- you introduce the twist gradually, and I guessed at several others before I got to daisies. I wondered if you'd have a look at the exercise I've suggested- 200 words about a sound and where it takes you, as I think you could do that from the perspective of the flower- adding another sense to this piece and sticking to my suggested word count. This is done to introduce a discipline and a structure- I'd like to see what you'd make of it as this piece here has a lot of depth. I do think there are some places where you could cut and trim lines anyway, to make it even more effective. Nice work.
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