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A season too late
Posted: 28 July 2006
Word Count: 63
Summary: Very much a 'spur-of-the-moment' reaction to the exercise in Poetry Seminar.
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Chambréd
is so much warmer
when the temperature rises
beyond the British expectation;
the heat is pure Mediterranean.
Balloons
hang in the humidity,
proclaiming Chloe's birthday;
scaffolding becomes a party piece.
The smell
of sticky black permeates
the air conditioning while
bare-chested navvies earn their wage.
Final
searches for holiday clothes;
"Of course, we are phasing out
all of the summer wear now."
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Comments by other Members
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 Mac AM at 09:07 on 30 July 2006
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I really enjoyed this, Joanie. So much humour and double meaning – especially the bare-chested navies earning their wage! Sounds like they are there for the entertainment factor too.
The smell of sticky black is an excellent way of describing the tarmac and the rhyme tells you instantly about this melting road. Chambréd is used wonderfully and I enjoyed reading the poem for its real sense of sense – if you excuse the confusion. Tell me, what was your overheard snippet of conversation?
Lovrd it!
Mac
<Added>
Doh - I cut and pasted the poem into Word in order to spell check my dodgy typing, only to lose the quotes!!
Sorry Joanie!
Mac
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 joanie at 11:53 on 30 July 2006
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Thank you for your response, Mac. The snippet of conversation was the bit in inverted commas! ...not a two-way conversation, just one part of it.
Lots of balloons were fastened to the gate of the house (Chloe must have been having a party!), but also onto the top of the scaffolding which covered the front of the house. It just caught my attention.
I have to say that I'm glad of the exercise, which made me take note - not a bad thing!
Thanks again.
Joan
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Xenny at 01:59 on 31 July 2006
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Hey Joan
I loved it as well. Especially this stanza:
The smell
of sticky black permeates
the air conditioning while
bare-chested navvies earn their wage. |
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So excellent!
You've made me want to have a go at the exercise.
Xenny
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 Nell at 07:41 on 31 July 2006
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Hi Joan,
I love the way the quite separate images together make a whole (reminding me of the ghazal exercise), and the title somehow adds to the odd mood of ennui. The balloon/scaffolding image juxtaposed with the smell of tar - how instantly accessible that is - suddenly I'm in the street and far too hot! The last line strikes as horribly true - how often have I heard those exact words - but having more or less given up shopping they made me smile.
A great response to the exercise.
Nell.
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NinaLara at 08:31 on 10 August 2006
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Dear Joanie,
I really enjoyed this - especially the opening and ending. Oh and the middle aswell. It seems to be the perfect comment on the summer we have had.
Nina
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