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After the Fall of the Galactic Empire

by bjlangley 

Posted: 29 June 2006
Word Count: 269
Summary: A Star Wars based entry for the current humour/comedy groups challenge.

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Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that we overthrew the evil Empire, but I’m beginning to think that maybe Dad had a point. They’ve reformed the senate, and boy, democracy in the modern age stinks! You’d think, what with all the destruction going on in the last few years they’d be focussed on rebuilding the worst hit planets, restoring trade routes and the like, but no, it’s all gone PC. Apparently after years of oppression we all need our ‘roles in this new society reassessed’ and ‘the old labels are a sign of the old regime!’ I mean, what better way is there to explain the Wookiees for the Ewoks, the big hairy ones versus the little hairy ones. But no, not anymore. Wookiees are now the follicularly crowded vertically liberated, and Ewoks are follicularly crowded vertically challenged. Jabba the Hut wasn’t a big fat evil slug with a taste for women, he had an alternate body image and was sexually and socially dysfunctional.

It’s disgraceful, I can’t go back to Tatooine for fear of running into the Tuskan Raiders. Not because I have any fear of them, but because I can’t remember if they’re socially impaired or communally handicapped. And do they engage in Intra-species dining, or do they stick to a non-animal diet only?

I’d seriously consider turning to the Dark Side if they hadn’t renamed it the Light-deficient alternative. I can’t see an uprising of Light-Deficient Alternative Level 1 Seniors of the Sith, they’d be a laughing stock.

I wish Yoda was here. I know what he’d say. “Gone Mad, PC, it is!”


Luke Skywalker

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Comments by other Members

syorkslad26 at 07:24 on 30 June 2006  Report this post
Hi BJ,

From start to finish this is excellent. Being a huge Star Wars fan this hit a chord (I'm not going to be bias I promise, lol!). Wookies being virtually liberated. Ewoks being vertically challenged. Jabba being sexually and socially dysfunctional. Funny, funny, funny. Kind of makes you wonder who their psychiatrists would be doesn't it? And the punchline with Yoda is superb. Well worth the wait. Look forward to the much darker sequel where C3PO finally comes out of the closet. All the best.



Sorry, that reads so lame. I meant the follow-up letter. Just ignore me. I go away after a while. Lol.

Philip Marston at 13:02 on 30 June 2006  Report this post
Yes - PC does kind of make you want to turn to the dark side.

Funny, much, Good it was.


baumski at 10:14 on 05 July 2006  Report this post
Personally, I never got the Star Wars thing except for Yoda or, as is more widely known, the late Queen mum (God bless her).

That aside, a lorra lorra laughs and a worthy winner.


syorkslad26 at 11:24 on 05 July 2006  Report this post

Lol. That conjures up a sketch / sitcom all on it's own. The late Queen Mother as Yoda, the Queen with Leia's infamous hair buns, Prince Philip as the clumsy wookie, Prince Edward as C3PO. Brilliant.


bjlangley at 17:29 on 09 July 2006  Report this post
Thanks for the comments guys, much appreciated. It's one of those things, the more you think about it, the more ideas come out. Mos Eisley is no longer a hive of scum and villainy but an establishment thriving with those offering an alternative moral attitude.

Thanks again,


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