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Board

by shatner 

Posted: 22 June 2006
Word Count: 484
Summary: Short radio sketch


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BOARD TO DEATH

CHARACTERS

Mrs Waddington - late 50s respectable lady
Driver - Female Ambulance Driver
Medic - Female Ambulance Medic
Doctor - Male Doctor
Operator - Female Telephone Operator

OPERATOR: (D) Which emergency service do you require, fire brigade,
police or ambulance?

MRS WADDINGTON: Ambulance, it's my husband, he's hurt. I don't know what to
do. I can't wake him up. He's lying on the floor. There's
blood. Please help send someone quickly.

OPERATOR: (D) I need your name and address.

MRS WADDINGTON: Waddington. We live at Park Lane.

OPERATOR: (D) I need you to be more specific.

MRS WADDINGTON: Go past the jail, down Regent Street, past Liverpool Street
Station.

OPERATOR: (D) We'll send someone straight away.

MRS WADDINGTON: Please hurry.

F/X: PHONE GOES DOWN AND FADE OUT TO SOUND
OF AMBULANCE SIRENS, PEOPLE LEAVING
CAR, KNOCKING ON DOOR AND DOOR OPENING

DRIVER: Mrs Waddington?

MRS WADDINGTON: Yes. Thank God you’re here.

MEDIC: Where is he?

MRS WADDINGTON: He’s in the study. Follow me.

F/X: SOUND OF RUNNING THROUGH HOUSE, DOOR
OPENING

DRIVER: Can you tell me what happened?

MRS WADDINGTON: He was coming in to get the candlesticks. They were up on
the shelf they must have fallen on him. When I heard the
crash I came in and found him on the floor.

MEDIC: He's breathing, but unconscious, we need to get him in the
ambulance.

MRS WADDINGTON: I’ll follow you.

F/X: FADE TO AMBULANCE SIRENS COMING FROM

INSIDE AN AMBULANCE

DRIVER: Has he got a pulse?

MEDIC: Yes but he's bleeding badly (pause) we're out of big
bandages.

DRIVER: What!!

MEDIC: We’ve only got a box of small ones.

DRIVER: Just join some together.

MEDIC: How many?

DRIVER: I don’t know. Just connect 4.

MEDIC: That's got it.

F/X: SOUND OF AMBULANCE STOPPING AND DOORS
OPENING.

MEDIC: We need a doctor! Quick!

DOCTOR: What have we got?

MEDIC: Male, late 40s, serious injury to the cranium.

DOCTOR: Blood pressure 110 over 60. Pupils dilated. He doesn’t look
too good. We need to get him into theatre now.

DRIVER: I’ll go and see his wife.

F/X: SOUND OF A HEART RATE MONITOR INSIDE
OPERATING THEATRE

DOCTOR: Ok, I think I've stopped the bleeding, nurse some suction
please I can't see. There seems to be a funny bone in there,
I need to remove it. (pause) It's really tricky, can't quite get to
it, nearly there’¦ nearly there.

F/X: SOUND OF A LOUD BUZZER GOING OFF

DOCTOR: Damn!

F/X: FADE TO GENERAL BACKGROUND SOUND OF
HOSPITAL WAITING ROOM

MRS WADDINGTON: They're taking a long time it's such a frustration.

DRIVER: Patience Mrs Waddington, I realise you're worried.

F/X: SOUND OF DOOR OPENING

DOCTOR: Mrs Waddington?

MRS WADDINGTON: Yes. Yes Doctor. Is my husband all right?

DOCTOR: (Pause) Sorry.

F/X: SOUND OF WOMAN SOBBING

MRS WADDINGTON: It's so unfair. I loved him. You don't care. You think this is
just a game.






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Comments by other Members



syorkslad26 at 11:16 on 23 June 2006  Report this post
David,

Very clever. And very funny. Ingenious way of getting the various board games insinuated, most especially connect 4 (I sense you were getting desperate here but it paid off, lol!). Well done!

syorkslad26

Jubbly at 08:22 on 26 June 2006  Report this post
Hi shatner, I really liked this, lovely stuff, quite spooky in a way. Just one teeny suggestion, when she gives the directions, go past jail etc, maybe you could add, something like 'It's the red house', just to keep the flow going.

Very original and good pay off.

Jubbly

Account Closed at 15:19 on 26 June 2006  Report this post
Very clever, David,
you kept the theme running nicely throughout.
I think you could cut or ham up some of the non-board parts e.g.:

DRIVER: Can you tell me what happened?

MRS WADDINGTON: He was coming in to get the candlesticks. They were up on
the shelf they must have fallen on him. When I heard the
crash I came in and found him on the floor.


I think it was in the study, the candlestick etc

MEDIC: We need to get him to hospital


F/X: FADE TO AMBULANCE SIRENS COMING FROM

INSIDE THE AMBULANCE


MEDIC: He's bleeding badly (pause) we're out of big
bandages.


DRIVER: Just join some small ones together.

MEDIC: How many?

DRIVER: I don’t know. Connect 4.

Likewise, I think you could reduce the operating theatre part and maybe get a Happy Families reference in.

Hope this helps

Elspeth


Flyswat at 18:05 on 26 June 2006  Report this post
HI THERE SHATNER. AS A RAW RECRUIT TO THE SITE ITS BEEN GREAT TO VIEW OTHERS WORK, AND I FOUND YOURS VERY AMUSING INDEED. GREAT IDEA. AS A MATTER OF INTEREST HOW LONG IS THE RUN-TIME?
REGARDS
HEATH


shatner at 20:27 on 29 June 2006  Report this post
Hi folks, thanks for all the comments. Incidentally syorkslad26, if you thought the connect 4 reference was stretching it a bit you should have seen my plans for Buckaroo :) I reined myself in though. Also Heath, I'm not sure how long the run-time was/is ... sorry.

David.

Bav Dav at 07:22 on 19 July 2006  Report this post
Not really my cup of tea but you've done a good job of carrying the theme through the piece although connect 4 was maybe a game too far. Having said that, the Operation buzzer made me laugh out loud.

I think it may be better served with more of a dark ending, I think Mrs Waddington sounds like a very dark character and would have liked a twist.

Actually the whole thing put me in mind of Naked Gun.

Good stuff,

B



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