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Meeting Mr Tingle

by Katy Kat 

Posted: 07 June 2006
Word Count: 401
Summary: A fairy tale...


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December. Christmas Eve to be more precise.

The cottage was in darkness. Ice laced the dirty windows.
Snow had been falling for days, obscuring the pathways to her door. The old lady slipped in and out of sleep.

She was dreaming. A frown creased the old face.

"Mother! Be reasonable! You know things can't carry on like this. I'm a busy man. I have a job. A family. I can't keep trailing out here. Betty and I have looked around 'The Evergreens'. You'd love it there. People to talk to. Meals cooked for you..."

"What about my dog?"

"Oh to hell with the bloody dog! I'm off. Sort yourself out!"

A teardrop ran between the creases of papery skin.

The Grandfather clock chimed the hour.

The old dog, sensing her distress, lay his big head on her lap and cried with her. He was hungry. They had shared the last of the food yesterday. He lay across cold feet and tried to warm them.

She awoke with a start. The dog was barking. Someone was banging on her door. She tried to stand but she couldn't feel her legs. She tried to call out but her voice was frail. Who could that be out in this weather? Oh dear...oh dear..

No matter. She lay back in the chair and closed her eyes.

The Grandfather clock chimed the hour.

As her eyes opened again the old lady remained quite still and tried to understand what she saw. There was a glow in the room. Shadows flickered on the walls. Her hands and feet tingled as circulation returned. There was someone nearby but she wasn't afraid. No she wasn't afraid...

He was kneeling at her feet. "C'mon Mary. Try a taste o' this broth me darlin'. Warm yer cockles will this".

Warmth trickled down inside her. Good.. so good..

Such a kind face. Big strong hands - so gentle as they wiped broth from her chin.

"I've got to go now me lovely. The doc's on his way to 'ave a look at yer. There's food in yer pantry an' ol' Baskerville's fed an' watered.

"Who are you?" The voice was barely a whisper. "Do I know you?"

"Don't matter me darlin'. I knows you."

"Your name...what's your name?", she called as he made his way through the door and out into the night.

She couldn't quite catch his reply. Sounded like Chris...














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Comments by other Members



crowspark at 11:53 on 07 June 2006  Report this post
Great piece of writing Kate.

Liked your tight sentences and particularly liked;

The cottage was in darkness. Ice laced the dirty windows.


The ending puzzled me for just a second then I clicked!

Poor Mary, her son wants to put her in a home and leaves her with no food for Christmas! The ingratitude of children.

Thank goodness for the goodly Mr Tingle.

Great flash.

Bill

Katy Kat at 13:03 on 07 June 2006  Report this post
Thanks Bill

Glad you liked it. 'Spect that's what my kids will do with me. I've heard 'em calling me the grumpy old woman. Well I won't go! Oh no! Not without a fight! Got to think of me cats me dear...

Best

Katy Kat

Prospero at 14:52 on 07 June 2006  Report this post
A lovely story Katy, gentle and kind, with a true warmth to it.

Well done

John

Katy Kat at 20:15 on 07 June 2006  Report this post
Thanks John. Glad you enjoyed it.

Best

Kate

Dreamer at 22:18 on 07 June 2006  Report this post
A little young to be talking of old age homes don't you think?

Birth, the way we enter the world is sudden and so full of hope and possibilities. Surounded by people that love us and want us. Too bad the way we leave is often the opposite. Your story conveys this well. Well done.

Brian.

mermaid at 11:30 on 08 June 2006  Report this post
Hi there Katy,

I really enjoyed this story, especially the paragraph below, as various images seemed to be juxtaposed: the way she slips in and out of sleep also gives me the impression that the snow is slippery and lethal, and highlights her frailty if she were try and walk on a slippery path.

'Snow had been falling for days, obscuring the pathways to her door. The old lady slipped in and out of sleep.'

I also imagined Mr Tingle as being like a sort of odd guardian angel.

Like it.

Mermaid



Katy Kat at 18:18 on 08 June 2006  Report this post
Hi Brian

Thanks for reading and your comments. I don't know about being too young for a home - I feel about 100 at the moment..

You are so right about the way we treat our old folk. I worked in care of the elderly for several years. Such vulnerable gentle people who deserve so much better than they often receive.

Best wishes

Kate

Katy Kat at 18:24 on 08 June 2006  Report this post
Hi Rosemary

Thank you for reading my ChrisTingle story and for your comments which I appreciated. It was only meant as a Christmas fairy tale but unfortunately it's a very real way of life to some elderly folk.

Kind regards

Kate

Elbowsnitch at 09:13 on 13 June 2006  Report this post
Hi Katy, I love 'the folds of papery skin' and 'Ice laced the dirty windows'. And the dog lying across her cold feet to warm them. A very effective flash, making great use of the 'Tingle' theme by leaving the word unspoken at the end.

Frances

p.s. The Evergreens is an excellent name for a retirement home. I once came across one called 'Surfer's Paradise'.

Katy Kat at 15:30 on 13 June 2006  Report this post
Hi Frances

Thanks for reading and comments much appreciated. Surfers Paradise sounds brilliant! Can't you just picture grannies on surf boards! Book me in!

Best

Kate


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