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Woman

by Nance 

Posted: 25 March 2006
Word Count: 217


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Am I not a strong woman? I always knew the answer on this very question. But not in the minutes when I知 looking at you. These are not only doubts. I feel terrible confusion which is not peculiar to me. I don稚 pity myself in the least but who can tell me why now I知 not able to write at least one sensible word, at least one legible letter? If I can one day perhaps I would choose the photo of yours with the brightest eyes, with the most vivid smile, the photo which sets your heart free; And I壇 hide it into the most distant corner of my soul. In order to see you any time when I miss your look BUT in all other days it must at least seem to me that I知 a strong woman.
One exception, listen to me. If you take my hand, only carefully, very cautiously, and calm me with the help of your two-three words, I知 actually sure that this evening I shouldn稚 need the positive answer on that question. To say more, if I feel your shoulder close to mine, I知 ready to cry to the whole world that I知 not at all a strong woman.
I am just YOUR woman, and then who cares for the strength?






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Comments by other Members



AimeeLou1984 at 17:10 on 26 March 2006  Report this post
I've just realised you actually did post this in your portfolio and not just in the beginners group so you will have to forgive me for my comments there!lol

There were bits in this story which I felt could have been put a little better for example:

Am I not a strong woman? I always knew the answer on this very question.


For em that would have been better if you had said:

"Am I not a strong woman? I have always known the answer to this question."

That's just my opinion however and I know that I am terrible at how I word things.It's all a bit of a learning curve at the beginnign I'm finding and I feel you do have a good sense of story telling.All you need is to work on how you put things together and to change a few words here and there.

I hope this helps and hope to read more from you soon.If you do need anything don't be afraid to ask!

Aimee xxx

Nance at 18:04 on 26 March 2006  Report this post
Thank you very much, it is always good to hear others' comments, and I think your opinion is quite right. I'll change these words. A huge "thank you" for your suggestion. It'll be sound much better. Nice to meet you.


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