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Black Immediacy, Dark Matter at Atomic Ground Zero

by seanfarragher 

Posted: 21 March 2006
Word Count: 482
Summary: FLASH POETRY SUBMIT FOR: "Now I will shine for all the world to see."
Related Works: “The Garden of Earthly Delights -- 2005” • Dreams of Comte Donatien Alphonse François de Sade • FAST FOOD GEOLOGY (some changes) • La Fin de la Lolita (revised) • Modern Man Discovers Dark Matter • Moral Man/Immoral Society after Reinhold Niebuhr (1932) • 

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Black Immediacy, Dark Matter at Atomic Ground Zero
Sean Farragher

"Now I will shine for all the world to see."

We purify absent light with incandescent streaks
of imported mornings invented from history
not deciphered, but abstracted and dangerously
compressed until the mantle shook with billions
of years of force to ascend oceans to hold half zero
while the binary number washed up at riverside
with shad, eels and porgies.

The fish were an illusion. The sun did not shine.
Nothing defined the exterior. There was no
topology to arrange salt; mass was none;
the odor of decayed fish rafted into Amiens cathedral.

Techno-thriller banged haphazard bells on schooner,
a fore-and-aft rigged sailing vessel with two masts,
a foremast, and a mainmast stepped nearly amidships.
The old fashioned computer game show did not play,
would not calibrate to the empty roads and lean roses.

Red, Gray, Viridian sails violate ocean waves
over turned, under spun whirlpools in descent.

We drown. We elevate precious absent light
to empty morbid space until out of control,
oily waters complete us, our Pacific dies too soon.

Radiance unsettles what is, and what won’t fit faithfully
in the molds. Production held up. Vice respects absence
and glare from black sun, and I know “now that I will shine
for all the world to see” while lepers danced suspended
in chalk ooze while magical slurry settled into open
delta no GPS could map. During the next cycle,
and next, we celebrate nothing and that nihilism
brittle as throat-lost words -- echolalia’s song
strummed by nine year old girl. She said "bread, bread,
father, father, mother, mother, Mary, Mary, Jesus, Jesus,
Kate, Kate, and light, light"

Burnt umber sky shifts faulted crust into sandstone streaks.
Every gasp, sexual moan, at large, with clever gestures
drawn by Monet stripped blind he fingered canvas to put down
tint, value and space where liberty failed. Light was dead.

One last time, two mimes twaddled while another sister
had sex with the an empty spoon until there
wasn’t any pleasure; no ends, --

Then, as birth, crimson cerulean arc of space,
low, at left corner, curved with the day sky
raised by no obvious hand to shape and shadow
palisade walls, five mile high with escarpment
driven down another fifty miles to magma swells.

An infant mesa, broad flat topped reflected easily
renaissance light while Nothing, that ocean of matter
revised, innocent and tangible pushed the ideals
into more than three, four, seven,
eleven simultaneous dimensions .

One answer given for black Immediacy:
I shine for the world to see,
when I slash into that Grand Canyon Gorge
from rivers too tame to matter
given undulating fair sky
saturated with 40 billion souls
receptive to zero mass
and an unpretentious ash
that rains too simple.

I walk about the space, my callused footprints
found whole in the arguments for dark and not.




END







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Comments by other Members



paul53 [for I am he] at 08:45 on 22 March 2006  Report this post
Hi Sean,
The nature of this particular group makes comment difficult. We are, by creating Flash poetry, semi-sacrificing our art to produce something deliberately over-swiftly; something "off the cuff"; something that by its rushed nature risks heavy criticism from those not knowing the provenance as we haven't given it the time it deserves. Judging Michelangelo by how he touched up the paintwork on his kitchen wall, perhaps.
My approach to this is to regard the Flash group as a Writer's Lounge extension: somewhere to relax, be informal, have a bit of fun. Often I upload an "as is" piece with no tweaking, or I make it humorous, or self-mocking, or deliberately light. I sacrifice my art for a time of play. Also, I suppose, it is partly an exercise in seeing what professionalism has percolated into my depths; just what will emerge if I set put pen to paper and then get out of the way.
*
To its credit, this piece does not come across as being rushed, or light, or show signs of any of your art being sacrificed. It strides through its subject with the same measured pace as your other works on this site; sometimes acute, sometimes baffling, as if expected in most “stream of consciousness” works.
I can’t pretend to understand all of it [especially at this time of morning; especially with only a couple of read-throughs] but what struck me most were the juxtapositions, and I still don’t know whether they enhanced or interrupted my reading of it. Suddenly switching to
Amiens cathedral
or
lepers dance suspended
left me floundering a bit, I confess, but doubtless the connections are there inside you, just as [for example] the many references to Denver in Ginsberg’s “Howl” are pregnant with meaning for the author.
Anyway, hope you win, as I’d be waiting with bated breath to see the challenge you’d set.
Paul

seanfarragher at 11:37 on 22 March 2006  Report this post
All I can say I wrote the poem over a two day 24 hour period Monday and Tuesday. I don't consider it polished, finished. I write as I write. I do appreciate your criticism. Lepers and Amiens cathedral are aesthetic opposites -- and maybe they stop the reader and serve only my purpose. Lepers was automatic. It just wrote it. Amiens replaced the word cathedral. Amiens is a unique and beautiful place. Lepers refer to degeneration and perhaps another way of saving AIDS or HIV without pondering those currently heavy words. I will think about removing them. I imagine there are many lines that could be cut from the poem. I thank you again for the read and criticism.

cust at 16:23 on 23 March 2006  Report this post
Hi Sean

I find it really interesting to read works like this - dense and intricate, brimming with allusions and imagery. I find it funny to think that your mind produces this cornucopia of richness during an off the cuff exercise, while mine seems to run from words or touch them only where necessary. So in that context I find your work hard to understand, but do I need to understand? I guess a few more readings might help me to get a handle. Can I ask: how does it feel after writing such? Do you get a sense that you have outpoured something, completed some links in your mind? I only ask to try and get into your process (as I'm intrigued!!) and to compare how I feel when I've written.

Lucy

cust at 18:40 on 24 March 2006  Report this post
Thanks Sean. It is interesting to get a glimpse into your creative process. I don't know if you recall that we have talked before on here, and you did tell me before about your layering technique, which I find very interesting. I told you about my word fatigue that time, and I find it annoying that I have become tired of language in such a way. I seem to want to use as few as I can to say as much as I can... if that is possible. I admire works of art like that.... so in complete contrast, your style is intriguing. I admire how you can grapple with the whole sea of language without feeling like you are drowning!

Lucy

seanfarragher at 19:15 on 24 March 2006  Report this post
It is fascinating how different poets arrive in different places. The complexity and nuance of meaning does drown me as well, but I study the words as if they were living. If there is a word that drowns me as you put it, I look up it origin, study the history, and sometimes rearrange the context of the poem to fit the word. I would love to chat with you about poetry or any other subject any time.

Thanks


Sean

ccatherine at 23:15 on 24 March 2006  Report this post
Sean

I have not looked at any previous comments and I am commenting on this after a single read. I certainly don't understand all of it. But it feels that the first stanza is refering to man's destructive nature and desire to change anything just to make it different, as different must be better. The lack of punctuation here means that the images are piled.

I do like
the fish were an illusion

of the second stanza - see the grass is not always greener and quite often change produces rotten fish.

Love:
We drown. We elevate precious absent light to empty morbid space until out of control, oily waters complete us, our Pacific dies too soon.


This to me speaks of the human condition - really like the use of absent light instead of darkness which I would have used. Also oily waters seem to be talking of paintings again suggesting that life is very illusory.

Stanza six is a reflection of the previous stanza and speaks of radiance which reveals too much, men like the dark because their deeds are evil or at least unsean.

Overall I really like this although it is difficult and I don't claim to understand most. I thought it might interest you to know what on a first reading, the poem says to me.

Cathy




<Added>

Didn't respond to all of it because it would have taken too long.


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