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The Soul`s Right to Breathe

by hailfabio 

Posted: 02 March 2006
Word Count: 165
Summary: Pretentious rubbish, but it's all I have at the moment.


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What is true liberty? True freedom? True Happiness?

Liberty is the soul's right to breathe,
every living thing deserves liberty,
but it is not easy to attain.

Could it be loosing the sense of what you are doing?
When you forget about yourself and just live without constraint?
Is this truly consistently possible?

I believe not,
life doesn't stay the same
and it isn't as we expect it to be.
It's beautiful.

There are periods of routine
and mundane, uneventful days.
Without these days, periods of liberty
and stimulation would be sedated.

Travelling fuels the growth of the soul.
Being in different situations,
having to communicate effectively
and being great company without the aid of technology.

I love the sea and the sky.
You can depend on them,
they are always there, consistent.
Humans can never comprehend their true size and power.

Routine strangles the soul,
so take your share of liberty
and try to do something
you never have as often as you can.






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Comments by other Members



gard at 16:27 on 07 March 2006  Report this post
Hi Halfb

interesting piece. I understand your sentiments.

Almost seems to be a sort of prelude for an the question on the philosophy of "is there such a thing as freedom?". Why I am a great believer of "well it's all relative isn't it?" (the hitchhikers guide approach I think).

You know on re-reading I got the idea that you as the writer are still searching to write the heart of this piece. That you are placing down on paper you pre -thoughts for another poem - on the conditions of liberty.

Perhaps I am wrong

Gina

Brian Aird at 22:43 on 07 March 2006  Report this post
I agree with Gina - it looks like a page from a poet's notepad - each verse an idea worth expanding.

Its a thought provoking piece though and it certainly raises questions about what is meant by liberty. For examnple, if we have freedom then we can chose to do nothing - fit in to the routine of life when it pleases - as well as escape from it when we want to.

I find without the routine of writing something every day, I'd probably just stop. But that doesn't make routine bad or stopping writing for a while bad either. It's the choice and the ability to make decisions that counts.

Brian




engldolph at 19:15 on 09 March 2006  Report this post
Hi Stephen,

Yes, lots of interesting thoughts... not really a poem, but some very poetic lines, like:

I love the sea and the sky.
You can depend on them,

more a philosophic preview...

if you haven't already, read Schopenhauer, I think you would find a soul-mate

enjoyed
Mike



NinaLara at 08:16 on 26 March 2006  Report this post
This poem clearly expresses the wondering of your consciousness ... but i feel you have edited the feeling from your thought!

What I would do next is cross out every word that doesn't communicate what you wanted it to - so it could end up looking like this:

soul's right to breathe,

live without constraint?

life doesn't stay the same

It's beautiful.

uneventful days.
sedated.

Travelling growth
communicate
without technology.

the sea and the sky.
consistent.
Size and power

Routine strangles
try to do something
you never have as often as you can.

And take it from there!



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