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Imagined Relationship
Posted: 21 November 2005
Word Count: 44
Summary: Is that someone playing with my heart again?
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I love your eyes.
In the twilight frosty Friday.
You're lonely
and drunk.
You know I'm there for you,
not a threat.
For you to bounce off
until you feel better again.
My hopes left empty.
You love my eyes.
Our reasons are different.
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Comments by other Members
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 James Graham at 11:00 on 22 November 2005
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This is excellent, very concise and controlled. Every line counts. The last line is a very good open-ended ending which makes us reflect, and leads us into thoughts not only about the relationship portrayed in the poem, but other relationships too.
I like the way it's framed by 'love your eyes' and then the last line is outside the frame.
I can see a connection too between the 'twilight frosty Friday' and 'hopes left empty': just that they hit the same note and both convey - one visually and one abstractly - the sadness of this transient relationship.
The title is intriguing. Imagined, i.e. fantasy, relationships are usually much more cosy than this, but this one is quite bleak. Or else the title may be telling us that the two people in the poem really are together but the possibility of this ever becoming a more real relationship can only be imagined.
Well crafted - there's an abruptness, a starkness about the form that suits the content very well.
James.
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 engldolph at 20:11 on 22 November 2005
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Hi Stephen,
Yes, definitely one of your best.
The twist of two people looking lovingly into each others' eyes, for diffrent reasons, is very well done.
Not that it is particularly relevant, but I found your intro comment about is someone playing with your heart not quite ringing true...if you are expecting something different from that person, it is you who are playing a game, not her.
enjoyed
Mike
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Ambitions of Lisa at 21:04 on 23 November 2005
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WOW! This is fantastic Stephen...
I'm sure she appreciates you being there for her... and I'm sure she is always there for you if you ever need the favour returning..
:)
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 joanie at 21:20 on 23 November 2005
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Stephen, I'm late to this - sorry! - busy week. Yes, I agree that this is one of your best. I love 'In the twilight frosty Friday'.
Very thought-provoking and worthy of several reads.
joanie
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hailfabio at 14:34 on 24 November 2005
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Hello,
Glad this was well recieved. The idea is about friendship between opposite sexes, it can seem like you're a couple at times and maybe you develop feelings, but it's never going to develop into a relationship. Even though sometimes you might hope it did.
And I agree it is me playing the game.
Stephen
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