Water of Life
Posted: 05 September 2005 Word Count: 186
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Water of Life
So will it be like this, lying still, the bath gone cold, but I disinclined to rise?
I pull the plug out, take the chain between my toes, the water drains by gravity, the water runs away like apathy no effort of its own the water pools world wide and sans volition, reinvented, in due course, it falls again as rain.
Tropically driven, typhoon, wave or in suspension, mist; condensed or frozen, falling to the land to land again and let itself with no compunction find repose.
Are we like snow, do we re-incarnate like rain? Does two percent of dry disqualify and if so does the water, ninety eight percent of it, just flow and cut us through indifferently as water floods a plain?
And will it be like this, the bath gone cold and, disinclined again to rise, I'll pull the plug out, take the chain between my toes.
The water drains by gravity, the water runs away by apathy the water goes.
No effort of my own, I'll let myself with no compunction cleaned of life of expectation find repose?
Comments by other Members
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Ticonderoga at 17:11 on 05 September 2005
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This seems incredibly apropos of recent events in Louisiana. Obviously, what's being addressed is much more universal, but, like all poems which tackle big themes well, it certainly fits the moment. I'd be curious to know if this is a new poem or you felt drawn to it again by what's happening at the moment.
This is a very elegant, intelligent, involving poem.
Best,
Mike
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lang-lad at 19:31 on 05 September 2005
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Hi, Mike,
It's just that in the bath this morning as the water drained away I realised something about water I'd not registered before - how indiscriminate and blameless in itself it is, propelled by something else, as if gravity and consciousness are one and the same thing somehow and we're failing to see the water's just obeying orders.
I'd be in way over my head if I tried to address what's happening in any specific way.
I've commented inexpertly on your poem which did, oddly enough, appear, on the face of it, but not actually related.
elixa
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Ticonderoga at 12:28 on 06 September 2005
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'elixa', I like - a nice amalgam of you and elixir: somehow appropriate. Respect the humility of your response. 'Fraid I just blunder in at times like these and shoot from the heart, but your approach is probably wiser in the long run.
Mitakuye Oyasin,
Mike
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lang-lad at 14:20 on 06 September 2005
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Mike,
I'll copy this to your poem too so I'll know you'll get it (in a way I'm responding to your poem through mine)
I'm not sure what I've written isn't two poems in one after reading it to a friend this morning over the phone. But all I'm doing right now is getting it down. Its edits will happen later.
Thanks for your generous appraisals.(by the way I read her yours too and she suggested beginning it with the ending. She liked its jagged energy she said.
eliza with a zee today
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Ticonderoga at 14:41 on 06 September 2005
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Bugger! That's a really good idea, but I can't see my effusion as an artefact at the moment; it'll have to sit in solemn silience for a long time before I can think about crafting it.
God, I miss having a bath................(to lie in, that is - I do shower on a pretty regular basis!) Fegs, Meg!
Mike
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lang-lad at 14:51 on 06 September 2005
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Mike - I don't know which poem you're on about now - I assume yours?
Anyway - glad if it is, it provided something for future mullings.
cheers cher ami
e
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laurafraser at 14:13 on 03 October 2005
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lang-lad,
i like the simple tone of this, it reads like a chain of very concise organised (when is that ever the reality...?!) toughts that one might have as they lie in the bath and ponder the essence of water.
The thoughts of this poem have remained in my head as I write this and I thank-you for that. I like the subtle philosophical tone of rhis poem, it is not arogant or elite or challenging.
There is a quiet beauty to the poem.
Really lovely
Laura.
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lang-lad at 14:59 on 03 October 2005
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Thank-you, Laura,
I've just realised I had done a little more work on this poem and hadn't uploaded the rewrite - I've only changed the first little bit because a friend said she had an image of the bath itself rising instead of the bather. Thank-you therefore for drawing me back to it. And I'm very glad you have responded so positively to it.
eliza
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