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Lovers Lose Sleep.

by laurafraser 

Posted: 26 July 2005
Word Count: 63


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lovers lose sleep,
their heads lying on pillows
their eyes staring into each others,
hours tango past,
will this always last they ask
as they lie losing sleep
their hearts swelling like starving sponges
sucking the soul of the other,
saying silently come and lie with me
forgetting, (or perhaps not wanting),
to remember or coexist with the flow
of the people outside.






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Comments by other Members



joanie at 11:32 on 26 July 2005  Report this post
Laura, this is lovely. There are some wonderful phrases and images: 'their hearts swelling like starving sponges', 'hours tango past'.

I like the 's' sounds throughout; I'm trying to decide why they are right! I think it softens the whole thing even more.

Very enjoyable.

joanie

Dreamer at 02:07 on 27 July 2005  Report this post
Very very nice. Lovely imagery. Lovely feel, particularly as it seems everyone around me right now is getting divorced.
Thanks,
Brian.

Ticonderoga at 15:12 on 27 July 2005  Report this post
Yes, really lovely. I remember that feeling well.............


Best,

Mike

laurafraser at 17:21 on 27 July 2005  Report this post
Joanie, Brian and Mike thank-you for your comments

happy days

xx

Chem at 16:37 on 01 August 2005  Report this post
A fantastic piece. I wish I still felt like this!
Em x


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