I tried to kick the bucket
It was dressed up in me clothes
And flumming round the garden
But I only hurt me nose.

I thought I'd lost me marbles
When visiting the loo
But shortly after pop o'clock
I found them in me shoe.

I'm feeling in the pink now
And looking for me mummy
It's soft and rather oggie
But tastes extremely scrummy.

I wore me heart upon me sleeve
It fell off in the road
It rollied down the pavement
And was eaten by a toad.

I'll have to cut this short now
As I'm feeling not meself
So I have to take things easy
And be loving to me elf.