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Emptying a Dyson

by  Mickey

Posted: Thursday, August 24, 2017
Word Count: 214
Summary: Hot off the press! I have literally just written this after thinking how messy the accumulated muck in my Dyson looks through the clear dust container




How can a bag-less vacuum cleaner be considered an ‘improvement’ when, whereas before you just removed a sealed bag of dust and threw it away, you now have the body of the machine itself filled with shit that’s almost impossible to empty completely and leaves the inside visibly covered in crap?  All you have done is replaced a throwaway bag with one you have to clean each time!
 

I found it easier to remove a
bag of dust from my old Hoover
than fiddle with this complicated
‘cyclone-action’, overrated
Dyson, moving on a ball
which isn’t any use at all.
 
It fills up every other day
and, when I want to throw away
the dog hairs, fluff, and dust debris,
it takes an engineer’s degree
to take the bloody thing apart
with latches. Catch is where to start?
 
A job approached with fear and loathing
requiring protective clothing -
industrial face masks are a must
to breathe through all the clouds of dust.
 
I wish I hadn’t been seduced
by prices that had been reduced.
My poor old orange Addis broom
I threw away to make more room
for bag-less, cord-less Dyson cleaners
but, if I’m honest, just between us
I much preferred to sweep the floor
with my old Addis like before.