The concept of an ineluctable human dark side isn't at all popular and some might prefer not to believe it exists, but is does exist; alongside compassion and other worthy virtues. Pretending it isn't there at all is to ignore our own history. It is the human condition; we are all capable of murder, rape, theft, bigotry or bearing false witness just as much as we are capable of sacrificial love and creating things of exquisite beauty.

The same man who goes into war and acts above the call of duty or lays down his life for his friends could also be a wife beater or a criminal, if the conditions occurred to bring that about; there but for fortune go you or I.

If we all recognize our mutual imperfections, then none would think themselves above anyone else or entitled to a greater share of life, love or even life hereafter. The very humbling process of coming to terms with our dark sides should encourage respect and understanding for others. In that sense, the power of the dark side is to heal, because if we recognize defect in ourselves, perhaps we can grow to see goodness in those we hate or see as enemies.

Humans have killed each other with bombs, persecution and all manner of abominable things and none of us are free from guilt just because we didn't serve in any conflicts or sign any military decisions. It really is the human condition that programs us to try to be better than others, to kill, to covert but also to love and to cherish.

Recognizing this is the first step to improving the human condition - refusing to accept it is to perpetuate misunderstanding and ultimately grow the seeds of war. The man or woman I respect most is the one who doesn't think he/she is better than me (morally) but who is prepared to share with me on equal terms.

Our fellow humans in Iraq have an inalienable right to refuse imposed rule, to develop arms and to use them - just as we have done and continue to do. Nor is democracy necessarily better than any other form of government for Iraq. A dictator ship is only as bad as it acts in practice and any particular implementation of democracy can only be judged by its actions. So how many have we killed versus Saddam? How many have we tortured? How many children were deprived because of EU sanctions? How many children were never born because of our intervention? We must look at our own hands to see if they can ever be rubbed clean – the easiest sin to commit is by inaction to prevent injustice. All I did was to write an anti-war protest letter and send it off – how can that have been enough?

We are not free to believe what we want; only what can be shown to be correct. I propose that history proves us to be capable of bloody deeds as much as noble ones. Let's celebrate our shared humanity as it really is and not dissemble or place ourselves above others. I am good and bad, dark and white. I am to blame and I am blameless. Now let us heal.