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Brown Leather Comfort

by tusker 

Posted: 11 February 2009
Word Count: 125
Summary: Flash 1 challenge: Sorry I can't make it longer


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It smells of him. Once brown, age turned soft leather paler, its head rest indented with the shape of his head. Wide cushioned arms creased into different shades of light and dark.

For hours, seven days a week, long fingers played with its electronic control. Up. Down. Recline mode to show off unblemished soles of Tartan slippers.

Two Shoes, lying at his feet, eyed the cat flap, reluctant to leave and lose the chance of sleeping on that comfortable chair at a moment’s notice.

At last the chair, positioned beside a picture window from which, beyond, life passed by in muffled sounds, became vacant.

Now she stays outside, nose pressed up against glass as if in hope that the waiting game will soon be over.








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Comments by other Members



V`yonne at 12:39 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
I adored that description of the chair and the tartan slippers and the cat's name...

I wasn't sure what was going on at the end whether he'd died in the chair? I'd be likely to call this 'Vacant Posession' if that is the case.

from where, beyond,
beyond which...?


Bunbry at 12:41 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
I liked this as well! I did get a bit confused with Two Shoes being the cat but that's just my age...

Nick

tusker at 12:46 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
Thanks Oonah.

It was my father's chair. Two Shoes is a small black Russell that came in through the cat flap.

Yes, I'll change where to which.

Jennifer

tusker at 12:51 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
Didn't mean to confuse you, Nick.

We're a family that changes names. I'm Jiffner to some.

Two Shoes, originally called Tootise, has two black front paws that look like wee black shoes.

Her sister, Mair, is nicknamed, Belly. She's too fat to get through the cat flap.

Jennifer

titania177 at 13:36 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
Jennifer,
beautiful, very poignant, I could see and almost smell the chair! Loved the tartan slippers.

A few nits: It could start with "it smells of him", since we end in the present tense. Also, I wasn't sure why the cat was outside if the chair finally was vacant, what is the cat waiting for now?

Lovely flash!

Tania

tusker at 14:56 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
Thanks Tania. Noted your advice. Will change it.

Two Shoes is, in real life, a small Jack Russell. She waits outside because the chair is empty. The chair's occupier has died.

Jennifer

titania177 at 15:26 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
Ah, I see. I thought she was waiting for the chair to be empty so she could sit in it. It's a little confusing.

tusker at 15:55 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
I'm always a little confusing, Tania.

Jennifer

Forbes at 16:10 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
Beautifully done Jennifer. And apart from thing Two Shoes was a cat, I got it.

Animals do that.


And it was just long enough for someone of my weakened attention span...


Avis

tusker at 16:15 on 11 February 2009  Report this post
I understand, Avis. I suffer from the same thing.

Thanks for your kind comment. It doesn't matter if Two Shoes is a cat or dog. It can be taken either way.

Jennifer

tiger_bright at 11:56 on 13 February 2009  Report this post
Very sweet and sad, Jennifer. It brought to mind my father's old chair, where he spent many hours during his decline and before his death. Very moving and well-captured, thank you.

Tiger

tusker at 14:36 on 13 February 2009  Report this post
Thanks Tiger.

Yes, an object can make one feel sad especially a chair as it wears its owner's indentations after they've gone.

Jennifer



Jumbo at 14:35 on 14 February 2009  Report this post
Jennifer

Loved it. Great description of the chair and the setting.

Like others, 'Two Shoes' confused me - but all is clear now.

Thanks for sharing this. Terrific writing - that doesn't need to be longer!

Cheers

john

tusker at 15:02 on 14 February 2009  Report this post
Thanks John. Glad you liked it.

Jennifer

Cholero at 09:47 on 15 February 2009  Report this post
Jennifer

V nice writing, everything working together to get that mood right.

soles of Tartan slippers
- tells us a lot.

Got confused by Two Shoes, didn't read it as the cat's name first time around - maybe Two-Shoes? Or a different name altogether. having to figure it out took my mind away from the mood you set so well elsewhere.

Nice the moment you realise there's been a dead body lying ther all this while...

Good writing, thanks for the read.

Best

Pete

Prospero at 16:07 on 15 February 2009  Report this post
Lovely, Jennifer. I too thought that 'Two Shoes' was a cat. Not that it really matters, it is a sweet little story.

Best

John

crowspark at 21:23 on 15 February 2009  Report this post
Great voice and beautifully written. Very sad and moving.
The length is just right.

tusker at 06:47 on 16 February 2009  Report this post
Thanks Bill.

Jennifer


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